Mirror Mirror on the wall...
Just like our parents- we are the mirror our children look into for who they should be.
'Do as I say and not as I do' is a very basic way of saying that as parents- we must walk our talk. Our children are little sponges, not just listening to what we say- but more importantly watching what we do.
In order to have well behaved, committed and thoughtful children- we as their first teachers must check ourselves and walk our talk.
We tell them to play nice, don't call names, be responsible,don't swear, take care of your things, clean up, save your money, study and work hard, don't bully others, stand up for yourself, stop playing video games and go out and play..but where are they going to see the example of those things? In us.
For instance-
As you cuss someone out for cutting you off in the car?
Or gossiping and passing judgment on others?
Or telling a lie to get out of a commitment?
Or name calling the other parent in front of them?
Or putting wants over needs?
Or getting to work late?
Letting someone bully you?
Not really saying how you feel then talk about it later?
Look back on your own childhood and look at the mixed messages.
We swore we would never do these things, but yet, here we are, becoming more like them than we care to admit.
The biggest thing my son brought to my attention was that I was not financially responsible.
Once our gas was turned off and my son asked why. I told him because I didn't have the money to pay the bill. He reminded me that I just bought him a video game the day before, why didn't I use that money? I told him that I wanted to make him happy
and in his infinite wisdom, he said,
"Mom- hot water makes me happier than a video game."
Out of the mouths of babes.....
Be the mirror that makes your children proud; proud of where they come from and proud of themselves. Be a constant reminder that doing the right thing is not usually the easy thing
; and lead by example.
Letting them know that we're all human and make mistakes is a wonderful opening to some really great conversations..
Be the change you wish to see and your children will be the ripple of tomorrow.
Marianne Goldweber
